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Signs of Cheating ( Infidelity ) or an Affair Checklist.
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38 Signs of Cheating ( or Infidelity known as an Affair ) (cheating spouse, lover, sweetheart, companion, boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, husband)
Before you jump to conclusions, stay objective and realize that people change over time and may naturally become less attentive, less wanting to go out, etc. There may be a period of differences or the stress of having a modern household, employment and the stress of modern society.
Many times having a large number of these signs can simply mean that you both need to work on your behavior, intimacy, patience, kindness and affection, and even your personal appearance and manner. Being "needy", "clingy" and "too available" seldom works either. The point of all this is that relationships take work. People do stray or flirt, and usually they have some rationalization or excuse, which may be a reality or mere perception. COUNSELING can sometimes help. The point is that most people can only change themselves.
And no one wants much to be around an angry, nagging, irritable, needy, volatile, mean, selfish or argumentative person, or someone that makes no attempt at self-improvement nor any effort in their personal appearance. And many experts believe that humans are NOT highly monogamous. That trait has highly aided survival of our species, and is built into the genes. Don't be totally surprised or disgusted when people act in the true nature of humans. It is a fact of life that ATTRACTIVENESS is many things, but it is called attractiveness for a reason. Plenty of Not Beautiful people are VERY Attractive, in many ways. One way is to be enjoyable to be around!
At least three of these signs should be a minimum for concern. Item 1, Opportunity and Access is a common requirement for there to be flirtation or infidelity. That can be a priority to try to prevent if flirting is observed; But nobody wants to controlled or treated like a child. Some honesty can even help. Like "Is someone coming on to you?" Talk to a good counselor for suggestions.
Here are the Signs:
Your spouse or lover:
Always be cautious that many of these could, even several together, in some circumstances, not actually prove anything.
On the other hand, you may be avoiding the truth, which is not uncommon too.
If you are an abuse victim, you may require professional assistance and counseling. Many web sites and support organizations exist for victims of abuse. Many spouses are subject to emotional abuse or manipulation, such as passive-aggressive behavior or casting guilt upon the other party (you). A third party can be helpful.
It is likely better if your investigator attempts direct observation of cheating rather than you base accusations on two or three unusual behaviors. You could be wrong. Also, a direct confrontation with the other lover can lead to behavior or violence you may deeply regret. It is usually a good idea to allow a little time and counseling before confrontation with them, if ever.
If you suspect involvement with someone underage, this could be very serious, or an innocent friendship. Some adolescents simply seek close friendship or a place to go. Some adults enjoy being helpful friends for young people. You need to be well-informed and educated about child development and behaviors that may simply be developmental. For example, major hormonal changes at puberty in adolescents can cause major behavioral changes and extreme behaviors, particularly emotional instability, rebellion, lies, bragging or flirting. Flirting is not uncommon. If this suspicion came up just after some big family fight of a teenager showing much rebellion and statements about hating living at their home, consider some caution. They may simply be their wanting to be away from home. Don't jump to ANY conclusions. If there appears flirting with your spouse,it's probably a great time to observe very carefully, perhaps set some recording (if legal in your area) and NOT ALLOW the spouse to be alone with the developing adolescent,even if it means hiring a sitter,pretending to be a maid-helper service.
On the other hand, affairs with teens or molestation of even younger may occur. (Insisting on driving the baby-sitter, or children home and picking up groceries at the same time, etc). You may be wise to stop the opportunity or flirting before it develops into a sexual affair or worse. Don't rely on trust alone, but don't go wild with suspicions. You should educate yourself and POSSIBLY seek the advice of an expert (they report to authorities).
A competent investigative company can help educate you and provide some guidance or suggestions. If you suspect activity that may involve a minor, it is likely a good idea to be careful and very brief and mostly ask questions when discussing such matters with others. Any professional (counselor,polygrapher) MUST report suspicions or statements of abuse to law enforcement. Your questions on an unproven matter can turn into warrants and arrests in a HURRY.
Such are possibly legal matters and a good lawyer should possibly be consulted if it appears this matter could become a formal criminal charge or civil case supported by evidence. Serious criminal charges can arise from facts of a civil cases, such as divorce.
If there may be illegal activity or a possible divorce, you need expert advice and suggestions and checklists. You may also need suggestions and checklists on how to choose and deal with a lawyer from people with experience and knowledge.
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